0 Dysregulation

I think am self-destructive, or at least immune to stress, or maybe, have a damaged amygdala. Knowing very well that I have an assignment which deadline is imminent, exam in two freakin' weeks time, and untouched revision, yet I still am surfing the web like it's the holidays. Why can't I regulate my behaviour properly???

But I haven't been that relaxed and happy in such a long while. After church (7.30 AM service - a convert to early bird :)) I headed to Cold Storage at Takashimaya for grocery shopping. Unfortunately at just past 9 the shops were still closed. What [bad] luck. As such, it called for a detour to United Square's branch instead. But it proved a blessing in disguise because I scored a few discounted items and exotic buys. Like:

• Kashi cinnamon harvest (blame it on Amanda's influence! In fact I still have an unopened box of Dr. Oz's buckwheat flakes)
• 71% Ecuador dark chocolate block (Montezuma)
• Swiss farmer rolls (Swiss Bake) - 1/2 price!
• Pacific Almond milk (unsweetened) [couldn't bring myself to splurge on Silk's almond milk]
• Flavour Fall pluots - 1/2 price and in rather good condition still!
• Wild sockeye salmon [omegas yum!]

I think what put in a such a good mood was really today's breakfast: (last of) rolled oats (Binda Valley) cooked in unsweetened soy milk (Natura), sweetened with 1/2 mashed nana and raisins, upped with protein powder (Lifetime Life's Basic protein - the most neutral flavour thus far, compared to Sunwarrior and Vega Health Optimizer) and protein blend (real good food), spiced with cinnamon and chocolate chili and dressed with chocolate hazelnut butter (Justin's). A double whammy of chocolate would be bound to deliver a double whammy of endorphins and it sure did!

And then it was home sweet home. Managed to be a good girl and squeeze in a bit of work before spending ~2 hours (!) cooking and eating lunch, which was a ooey gooey curry & cumin bean stew (BRM whole grains and beans soup mix) with torned tortilla pieces, avocado, sardines (Boiromar), curly lettuce, cucumber, tomato, honey goat's cheese (Delamere) and beetroot relish.

A Jaffa sweetie (pomelo x grapefuruit) to end the meal. Guess what was found on Pubmed:

All applied methods showed that sweeties had higher antioxidative activity than grapefruit. Experiments on laboratory animals show that diets supplemented with sweeties, and to a lesser extent with grapefruit, increased the plasma antioxidative potential and improved the lipid metabolism, especially in the rats fed with added cholesterol.

Apparently a sweetie has more antioxidants than a grapefruit!

Lately people's been asking what I plan to do after I graduate. My PI is persuading me to consider PhD at TLL. For once, I really don't know what should my next step in life; so far it's been pretty straightforward: pri > sec > jc > uni, with the choice of school's quite [re-determined too. Pray for God's guidance in this.

2 A weekend to remember

Tourist in my Country

Gallivanting around the city, discovering the new and old side of Singapore. This weekend brought me to places from Marina to Tanjong Pajar, Duxton Hill and Ann Siang, Botanical Gardens and even Geylang [see below]. While each area boasted their own charm, I cannot help but feel that there is too much consumerism and 'urban spectacle' at the Marina area. An aura of development also hangs palpably in the Duxton area; construction was going on in every other shophouse, perhaps to make way for yet another indie cafe, quirky book store or off-the-track fashion store. Give another one or two years, I will not be surprised if Duxton morphs into the next Clarke Quay. In contrast, the vibe in Geylang, with pot-bellied Singaporean uncles, Bangla and China workers and families out in full-force over the weekend, feels so much more authentic, so much less pretentious.

Soul Food

While at Marina on Friday, I had lunch at Alli*Oli, a tiny nondescript cafe in Marina Link mall, seating no more than ten. It was the dreadful lunch hour, which meant the white-collar yuppies and expats were out in full force. This cafe was the only decent one that had space for dine-in. Although they had sandwiches and hot pasta, I opted for the salads which went at 3 for $8. Unfortunately, it was a case of over-ordering and over-eating. The black pepper linguine, tuna carrot & asparagus salad, and vinegary mushrooms were superbly tasty, but I still can't believe I finished that whole mound of food. Not to mention, the pasta was dripping in [olive] oil and the tuna was probably canned in brine for it was a tad salty. I felt quite disgusted after, and my bloated stomach (which remained bloated for another 10 hours or so) was a cruel mockery of my overeating episode. I must say it did provide fuel for my walk from Marina to Chinatown [or maybe it was the cause of it?]

The Big Bird wholemeal wrap from Salad Stop! is an in-house combination consisting of mixed greens, roast turkey, avocado, green apple, grapes, celery and ranch japanese wafu dressing. I had this for lunch today with the parents 'cause I was sick of Novena FC. I was slightly disappointed that the turkey was in the form of turkey ham rather than meat, and as such, quite on the salty side. That aside, I was pleasantly surprised how well fruits go in a salad, albeit "wrap" style, for I usually prefer salads to be of greens only. The tart sweet green apple and grapes helped toned down the saltiness of the turkey, while the avocado provided creaminess and healthy fats. Overall it was rather refreshing. I wonder why salads are so expensive though. Surely some green veggies shouldn't amount to more than $10? But a dear $10.80 this yummy wrap was.

At Cold Storage, I bought a tub of So Delicious Chocolate Almond ice-cream. The company specializes in dairy-free ice cream, and this one is soy-milk based and fruit-sweetened. (They also have coconut milk-based and almond milk-based ice creams but these were not available at CS.) I don't know whether to rejoice or be guilty. I mean it's the first time buying ice cream in years (although not 'real' ice cream). Anyway I opened the tub and peeked inside and it looked and smelled deep and rich with chocolate. Wonder what I should pair it with. Perhaps I should make spelt pancakes or even spelt ice cream bread.

And the highlight of the weekend no doubt goes to..... unctuous, creamy, bitter, sweet, potent, deep yellow mao shan wang durian. I specifically trooped down to Geylang after church to buy durians! At $20 for 2 boxes, this was reasonable. This was from the stall at Lorong 19, and as I walked from Aljunied side, I didn't know there were still so many stalls further down towards Kallang. Luckily the durians at those stalls didn't look that good, and although some were slightly cheaper, they were of other varieties (D24 etc). If not, the pain of regret! As mentioned in the first paragraphs, the atmosphere was fantastic. Families gathering by the road side to have durians on the spot, cars queueing for the $1 kampong durians... so very Singaporean. The two boxes of durians were so potent I could smell it even as I was in the MRT. Luckily no one else seemed to be able to smell it. Or do I have an extra sensitive nose for durians?

Quiet mornings and more chocolate bakes
this time with Royal Gala apples, Ezekiel cereal and spelt flour streussel

Play time with the Cat

At this point he was not fully awakened yet, but in less than a minute later he was all ready to bite!

1 Setting an undesired precedent

I don't know whether to be proud or ashamed of myself. Over the past few days I've been treating myself very well - too well for my own good. On Friday I decided not to pack lunch despite knowing that I had a long day, because I wanted a change from the usual. I decided I would get something from Starbucks in between my IT class and Immunology. I could probably count with one hand the number of times I've been to Starbucks (probably third or fourth time) so I wansn't familiar with their menu, or even whether they sold anything other than coffee. After a long glance at the display shelf, I decided on the Egg White, Pepper and Mushroom wrap. It doesn't sound the most exciting, but compared to the other mayo-laden and hefty looking sandwiches, I suppose it was a more healthy choice.

It looked small, so I wasn't sure if my $5.80 was justified. But when I started eating [during lecture], its size suddenly seemed to balloon - it was never-ending, like the Magic Porridge Pot story. The funny thing was the egg whites and the pepper/mushroom were not mixed but separated into two halves of the wrap, such that initially I was eating an egg white wrap, and then a pepper/mushroom wrap. Nevertheless it was really filling (think of all the proteins from the egg white) and really peppery. Not only does the peppers here refer to red/yellow capsicums, it also meant the black pepper folded into the egg whites. What made me guilty was that I actually enjoyed the bit of cheese hidden unexpectedly in the middle (cheese wasn't labeled on the display) - a savory sinful delight.

Then today I wanted to have something light - Novena Fish Head bee hoon (Goldhill) seemed to fit the bill. However I was disappointed when I saw its shutters pulled; it wasn't open on Sundays. So I went to United Sq FC and upon seeing that the Japanese chain Botejyu - the father of okonomiyaki - had set up a stall there, all my plans for "healthy" was gone. I ordered the salmon & steak yakisoba. In case you didn't know, yakisoba refers to noodles [soba] fried [yaki] on a hot plate, and then coated in the typical umami japanese black sauce - a grease and sodium bomb. Luckily though it wasn't as greasy as other versions I had before. If you have noticed, I underlined the word steak above. Initially that word missed my eye and I thought I was just ordering salmon yakisoba. And then when I saw him adding pieces of meat while cooking, I double-checked the menu. Indeed, the "steak" word was there except it was in a smaller font size! I intended to skip all the meat but to my surprise - and horror - I decided to try one piece - it tastes like chicken! I though. So one piece became two. And three. And before I knew it, most of the meat (I'm guessing beef) were almost gone. This is definitely unprecedented in my life's history. At that point in time I rationalized to myself that since I had made the mistake already I might as well not waste the food and eat it. But that's just part of the justification; I was well aware that I was eating [beef]. What's the beef with eating beef, you ask? Well, I don't know. It's like a vegetarian or vegan suddenly eating meat - and actually liking it - after abstaining from it for his whole life. It's not only a revelation; it's a mourn for the loss of control.

I guess it's back to healthy food for the weekdays.

Edit: after googling, I think those were pork slices instead.